Have you ever stopped to pay attention to the stream of consciousness convo you have with yourself in your head as you casually browse through your Pinterest stream? Just me? If not, I highly recommend it. I did today and I was able to very easily confirm my suspicion that I'm TOTALLY FUCKING CRAZY.
Herewith is the liveblog "transcript." I've indicated each pin I'm talking about with arrows, smiley faces, and other obnoxious graphics.
[EVERY time I see one of my pins repinned]: Somebody repinned MY pin! Even though I repinned it from someone else! Still, I RULE SO HARD!
1. I'm such a blogging idiot. Why don't I do more posts where I just take a stupid boring everyday item, write MAGIC over it in cute handwriting and then sit back and let 8 billion trillion people pin the shit out of it?
Lemons: 10 secret uses that will blow your mind...but not your budget. Pin now, read later!
15 ways to use sweat socks to organize your home. Why didn't I think of this!
Bug Spray...it's not just for bugs. Another pinner said: this bug spray info literally rocked my world! Now I cook with bug spray, I clean with bug spray and I even make clothes with bug spray. Yes, really!"
Cookin with bug spray, yo. For realz.
2. How long is it before someone invents a separate Pinterest site for all the cutesy, inspirational, tug at the heart strings quotery? Quoterist? Annoyingest? Still brainstorming...
3. Hmm, this chick is going quartz crazy today. Maybe quartz is a new trend? Why do I not know about this..?
4. She looks like a baby bitch.
5. I'm I an asshole if I just don't give a shit about Butterflies? [Don't answer that].
6.This woman is drop dead gorgeous. I hate her so much.
7. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT?! That door is even more beautiful that that hot chick I just decided to hate on the last pin.
8. OOhh, best jobs in America. Interesting...let me repin this as you never know if...though I forget if my boss is following me? Cause then what's she going to think? That I don't like my job and am looking for a new one? That I'm the type that always likes to keep my options open? That I'm gunning to get a raise? That I'm an ungrateful employee that deserves to be fired. Great, NOW I'M GOING TO GET FIRED.
9. I'm sorry, but chia pudding looks like it has bugs in it. Or mice poop. I think I'm gonna throw up in my mouth.
10. Who the fuck is One Direction? Holy shit, I'm old.
11. I sincerely hope these Olliblocks people have google adsense on their site or something. Cause I've seen this pin about 4036 times over the past 24 hours. These ppl are probably now in the 1% based on all the traffic and ad revenue they received from just this one pin. Obvz I need to pin this too...even though I would never do this project in a billion years. Also, yet again I'm a stupid, shitty blogger for not coming up with my own clever downloadable PDF that loads of ppl could pin and then never actually do anything with.
12. Candy corn nails? Those make me want to punch a Panda.
13. ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THAT PHILIP LIM BAG, RIGHT NOW?? I don't even wanna know how much it costs. Yes I do. CLICK. [FUCK. FUCK. FUCK].
14. PUPPY! ZHOU ZHOU, BHUZSH ZHUZSH ZHUZSH!
15. That cake looks nicer than my apartment.
16. Again with the quartz! Ok, I'm definitely missing out on a trend here. Maybe I should start a new blog called The Daily Quartz? I knew I should have been keeping up with my RSS reader.
17. A quinoa slider? Ugh...I think I'd rather eat chia pudding.
18. I think I need to start a board called "Shit I would wear if I wasn't fat."
Annnd, I'm at the end of my pins. Time to illegally download the first two eps of Downton Abbey.