Ok, so if you know anything at all about me, you''re probably aware of at least two things:
- I'm addicted to Diet Coke
- I'm obsessed with my Basset Hound Oliver
Now here's the thing: over the last decade or so, the design world at large has seriously embraced the idea of animals. Safari animals, cutesy animals, bizarre animals--you can find em everywhere. On fabric, in paintings, as little tchotchkes on people's coffee tables, on needlepoint canvases, etc. And dogs have certainly enjoyed their meteoric rise to fame throughout this whole process.
BUT, for some reason, certain types of dogs are featured in design shit waaaaay the hell more than all others. And if you, like me, are an owner of a dog whose breed never ever ever seems to find its way onto a goddamned throw pillow, I feel your pain.
The, Dachshund, for example, could not be featured on more shit if it damn well tried. Those little bitches are everywhere, on everything.
Like how about some Jonathan Adler Ceramic Dachshund bookends (for a hundred and fifty fucking dollars, mind you), or perhaps you'd like to celebrate 8 nights of Chanukah with your Dachshund menorah??. Or if you're looking to jazz up your wardrobe, surely you'd like a silk Daschshund skinny tie!? Throw pillows!? ANYTHING!?
And ok...I get it. Dachshunds are adorable, and cute, and long, but so are Basset Hounds, ppl! Which is why I find the Dachshund obsession particularly irksome. And like, I'm not saying do away with all Dachshund shit either...but do you think you can throw me a bone (pun intended) and send a Basset Hound toothbrush holder my way every once in a blue moon too??
And don't think you're off my radar either, French Bulldogs. Your furry asses are on just as much shit as the Dachshunds.
Now, don't get me wrong. I pretty much love all dogs way more than I love people...even these mofos in the "cool kids" dog club of interior design. But also, who's gonna stand up for the Bassets!?
I AM, GODDAMMIT.