[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 5: New York's Bravest Makeovers

I really loved the firemen theme of last night's show, and here's why:

• After watching the ep, I was extremely tempted to set my own TV on fire...and then my cable box that delivers HGTV to my apt...and then my own motherfucking face. YES, I WANTED TO SET THEM ALLLL ON FIRE.
• I think the entire staff responsible for dreaming up these assinine team challenges should all be FIREed.

Yeah, so obvs I was really feeling the whole firemen thing pretty hard. But that was the *only* thing I was feelin last night cuz SPOILER ALERT: Nina finally goes home!--and I'm actually pretty wrecked over it.

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[COOL OR NOT COOL?] TV In Your Bedroom

Here's a quick, not even close to comprehensive, rundown of the shows I watch on TV: SYTYCD, Pretty Little Liars, Vampire Diaries, Mad Men, every reality TV show on Bravo...like EVER, Design Star, Modern Family, Parks & Rec, The Bachelorette, Glee, Gossip Girl, Entourage, Nurse Jackie, Dexter...I could go on, but won't. Cause it's sadz.

Anyway.

Take a guess whether or not yours truly has a TV in her bedroom??

Right...so obvs. Yes. Duh.

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[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 4: Flower Power

Well bitches, its been a wet hot American summer all up in this piece, and I for one missed the shit out of our favorite Design Star whack pack as I was sweating my ass off over the July 4th weekend. But, hooray! They were back last night and better than ever (and by better, of course, I mean way, way, WAY worse).

Mostly I'd just like to thank Gawd almighty up in heaven above for giving us the gift that is Nina. Whoever cast this show deserves a gigantic fucking raise for finding this mural obsessed, one trick pony and I for one want to make sure they do not go unrecognized. I SALUTE YOU, HGTV CASTING DEPT!

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[INTERVIEW'D] George From 9 By Design, Part Dos

Yo! Check it! Here is Part Two of our exclusive interview with George Hribar, from Bravo TV's new hit show 9 By Design. Part One is here.

As you may recall, we all love the shit outta 9 By Design around here...and George...and his eyebrows. Today we have some more scoop on upcoming projects from Sixx Design, hot new artists we should be keeping our eyes on and, of course, wtf is up for season two!?

You know you wanna...

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[INTERVIEW'D] George From 9 By Design

Yo! Check it! Here is Part One of our exclusive interview with George Hribar, from Bravo TV's new hit show 9 By Design.

I watch a lot of TV...like A LOT. So I know what the fuck I'm talking about when it comes to "must see TV." And 9 By Design, Bravo's new reality TV show about Bob & Cortney Novogratz, their design firm Sixx Design, and their gigantic family was, hands down, my fave new reality show of the season. Even though there were only 6 eps in season one, I watched each and every one of them SO HARD...sometimes twice.

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[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 3: Symphony In the Name Of Design

Le sigh.

I swear to GAWD, HGTV, these team challenges are K-I-L-L-I-N-G us all softly...or loudly, as is the case when I'm screaming at my motherfucking TV the whole friggin time time.

This ep should have been called: Squiggly Lines, The Bitch Is Back. Cause spoiler alert after she reminds us that the "fawl from the top is a lawng way down": Nina wins ah-gain. a;sfljas;fdjslfjs;fjsdlfj!!

Why or how this keeps happening is a question for the ages, because the shit that she keeps doing is so beyond amateur, it makes that goddammned sunburst mirror from last week look like a Frank Lloyd Wright house.

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[DESIGN STAR RECAP] Episode 2: Fashion Forward Room Design

Buckle your seatbelts kids, cause now that the goose feathers have been wet vac'd up, it was a good ole fashioned Dicks v. Chicks battle royale tonight on ep numero dos of Design Star!

Yaaaaaaay!

"Julie blew away like a feather." HA! Nice one, Michael.

Anyway, after the dust settles, all the designers scurry off to get their new assignment. Not before Nina takes a fire hose filled with bitch and soaks the shit out of everyone in the "Penthouse" though.

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[Design on TV #3] 30 Rock

Design on TV is a new recurring column that allows TV fanatics to step into their favorite show's world by offering up a list of real-life items that will allow you to trick out your place in that show's signature fashion.  Some people call it "homage."  Some people call it "sick."  We call it "entertaining."

Design on TV #3: 30 Rock

When Tina Fey accepted an Emmy in the show's first year, she thanked her "dozens and dozens of viewers."  That's the kind of self-deprecation and irreverence that: 1.) makes everyone love Tina Fey and 2.) makes everyone love 30 Rock.

Everyone knows that 30 Rock is based on Tina Fey's own experiences as a writer on Saturday Night Live.  We follow Fey as Liz Lemon, head writer at TGS on NBC.  In the beginning, Lemon was often thwarted by her high-powered executive boss, Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin), but now they're buddies and they have the best boss/employee dialogue in the history of television (as in, "Hey, look at this video of a panda sneezing!  How adorable, right?  YOU HAVE TO FIRE 30% OF YOUR STAFF").  I could ramble on for hours about the hilarious hijinks of the folks over at 30 Rock, but let's just get to it.    

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